Thursday, March 6, 2014

Another tough night. Awoke at 3:40 AM. Couldn’t get back to sleep. But the dogs were sleeping soundly. No noise from downstairs. Time to pray for everyone who pops into mind as I make use of conscious time.

Finally fell asleep, when the phone rang far too early in the morning. It was M. asking if I needed help with mom. She calls for an agency I recently contacted, but I backed off. Cannot imagine another adult, another voice in this small space. I am further exhausted at the thought.

Betty and I walked the pups this morning. They were properly outfitted for the cold 17 degrees. I tried getting a urine sample from Val, but failed. He had been propped up against a snow mound and I had to stand awkwardly to get it. We shortened our walk; said hello to J, who was waiting for a friend to drive him off to breakfast; and deposited the dogs on the porch, where we said our good-byes with hugs and kisses. I don’t know what I would do without Betty. Don’t want to imagine it.

As I pulled out the ingredients I would need for breakfast—yogurt (dogs’ and mine), flax seed oil and cottage cheese (Val’s), steamed carrots (pups’), potatoes (possibly mine with eggs), colostrum (mine), boiled beef (pups’), cinnamon and maple syrup (mine), and Missing Link (pups’)—mom called several times.

[Me mixing flax seed oil and cottage cheese for Val]

Sandy

[Me adding beef and carrots and water to the pot to heat up for the pups]

Sandy

[Me making my yogurt with cinnamon and maple syrup]

Sandy

I didn’t answer. I have decided I can only do one thing at a time. And now, as I am so tired, I can hardly even remember what to do next. So I don’t answer. I know mom is lonely. I know mom needs company. But I have another book to edit and more work is coming in. I have to work to keep the roof over our heads. And I will not call M. to come sit for mom until both Rob and I must both be away from the house. No other adults welcome at any time. Erwachsene verboten! Adultes interdits! And whoever is sent here must also love dogs.

On top of everything, today is garbage day, which means Val will be going crazy every time a garbage truck runs by the house. We typically get at least 4 drive-bys every Thursday: garbage trucks running east and then west and two recycling trucks, first east then west. Sometimes, trucks coming from the river or Stoudts Ferry Bridge road drive by. It’s tiring. Must be tiring for Val, too. So much to protect. But right now, he is in my office. I would close the door, but today I cannot. It’s stuck again. Jake will need to come by and redo the work that the former carpenter did. Thank God for Jake. He’s responsive and good and wants to run a decent business. Jake is well on his way. His next job is to replace the Bathfitters tub and shower surround with tile. We’re also adding tile to the ceiling directly above the shower. We did the same for the house in NJ. Worked out well. I picked out simple matte subway tiles just yesterday. Picking out tiles is a fun thing to do. It takes me from the house and the pups and mom for a little while.

Well, mom is finally appeased. She asked for the time and made me promise to wake her at 9:00. That was at 9:11. I lied. She needs more time in bed, and I need more time to get things in order. I am so tired. Canceling my haircut in Coventry. More later.